Ep. 79 – 5 Things Dad’s Do Pt. 5: Unresolved Pain
In the latest episode of the “Empowering Choices” podcast, titled “Ep.78 – 5 Things Dads Do Pt.5,” hosts Joshua, Lucas, and Eric delve into the impact of unresolved pain and anger in fathers, and how these buried emotions can unintentionally distance them from their sons. Erik, one of the licensed professional counselors on the show, introduced the topic by discussing how past experiences and emotional scars can influence a father’s behavior and interactions with his children. He emphasized that certain behaviors, such as a reluctance to show affection, might stem from the father’s own upbringing where such displays were discouraged or mocked. The hosts explored how these unresolved issues might manifest in a father’s current family dynamics. Erik shared anecdotes from his counseling sessions, where he encountered fathers struggling to connect emotionally with their children because they had never learned how themselves. “It may be something that you as a dad are going to have a hard time with,” Erik explained, discussing how the lack of affection in one’s own childhood can lead to difficulty expressing it to one’s children. The conversation also addressed the societal expectations placed on men, which often discourage emotional openness. Lucas brought up cultural icons like John Wayne, noting how their stoic personas can perpetuate unhealthy norms about male emotional expression. Erik pointed out that this façade often hides real emotional turmoil, which can affect familial relationships profoundly. Practical advice was offered to fathers listening to the podcast. The hosts stressed the importance of confronting and resolving personal emotional issues as a crucial step towards improving relationships with their children. They suggested seeking counseling as a constructive way to work through past traumas and learn healthier ways to relate to one’s family. Erik likened counseling to calling a plumber for clogged pipes — sometimes professional help is necessary to clear the way for better emotional connections. To conclude, the episode encouraged fathers to take active steps towards healing their emotional wounds, thereby preventing them from negatively impacting their relationships with their children. “And at any time you can make improvements. Just start,” Lucas reassured listeners, emphasizing that it is never too late to change and improve one’s parenting approach.
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