Ep.83 – 5 Mistakes Dad’s Make With Their Daughters: Part 3
In the third installment of the podcast series “5 Mistakes Dads Make With Their Teen Daughters,” hosts Joshua, Lucas, and Eric explore the complexities of father-daughter relationships during adolescence. The focus of this episode is on the common pitfall of fathers treating their teenage daughters as if they were still little girls, rather than recognizing and adapting to their growing independence. Eric delves into the heart of the issue, explaining, “Dads and daughters become really close as she’s a little girl growing up. But as she develops independence…separates her more and more from dad.” This natural evolution can be exacerbated by puberty, which Eric notes has been discussed in previous episodes as a wedge driving daughters away from their fathers. The societal double standards that encourage boys to explore but tell girls to stay home due to fears like pregnancy only intensify this divide. The conversation then shifts to how fathers can adapt to these changes. Eric emphasizes the importance of maintaining a strong relational bond, which acts as a defense against many potential pitfalls of adolescence. “The relationship that you’ve cultivated is one of the biggest defenses against a whole lot of things,” Eric remarks, suggesting that a close relationship can prevent behaviors like stealing or worse, due to the fear of disappointing one’s father. Lucas adds insight into the practical steps fathers can take, suggesting that continuing to engage in activities with their daughters is crucial. He argues that the fundamentals of a good relationship—spending quality time together and showing interest in her activities—don’t change even as a daughter grows older. “Relational is the key glue for human beings,” Lucas notes, stressing the importance of adapting to the daughter’s new interests and life stage while maintaining the core of their relationship. Lastly, the hosts discuss how cultural differences might influence these dynamics, with Lucas pondering, “I wonder if we’d be having this same discussion in the same way if we were in Canada or Germany or India.” This opens up a broader conversation about the universality of these challenges and the potential variations based on cultural contexts. The episode wraps up with a call to fathers to be aware of and sensitive to the changes their daughters are experiencing, ensuring they evolve their parenting style to meet these new needs.
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